Tag Archives: does

Q. How does a cat commit suicide?…

Q. How does a cat commit suicide?
A. He shoots himself in the head nine times.

How does a [ethnic] man

How does a [ethnic] man propose marriage?

“You’re having a what!”

Q: When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain?

Q: When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain?
A: After a dye job.

How many professors does it take to change…

How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.

Hollywood Does Famous Composers

Steven Spielberg was discussing his new project–an action
docudrama about famous composers starring top movie stars.
Sylvester Stallone, Steven Segal, Bruce Willis, and Arnold
Schwarzenegger were all present. Spielberg strongly desired the
box office ‘oomph’ of these superstars, so he was prepared to
allow them to select whatever composers they would portray, as
long as they were very famous.

“Well,” started Stallone, “I’ve always admired Mozart. I would
love to play him.”

“Chopin has always been my favorite, and my image would improve
if people saw me playing the piano.” said Willis. “I’ll play
him.”

“I’ve always been partial to Strauss and his waltzes,” said
Segal. “I’d like to play him.”

Spielberg was very pleased with these choices. “Sounds
splendid.” Then, looking at Schwarzenegger, he asked, “Who do
you want to be, Arnold?” So Arnold says, “I’ll be Bach.”